Messages posted by : pavelski
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Jan,
That was not an emotive response! I was cool collected and "rational". Now if you want to see "emotive" responses...... I just think every person should decide themselves what to do in their lives, however their right ends at my nose! Where I live all the clubs, restaurants, bistros etc...said their profit would go down! Guess what it has been two years now and profit margin is still there and we now live in a healthier context! Jan, to me it is a non issue! I promise this is my last quiet, sane, calm, relaxed,mellow, response on this topic! a la prochaine! |
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At the risk of having many many men call/email me about this post, let me first begin by telling you all that I am guilty of many of these issues! I speak from painful experience!
Men you have to see the big picture in this issue! You want your wife to be with you! You want your wife to be happy! You want your wife to share in your passions ( all of them)! You want her to come into the hotel room at the end of the day like a little girl who has discovered a new passion! In short you want a long long happy relationship! If you read this post with the "big" picture viewpoint, I am sure you will conclude that this post is not an attack on your skiing competence, on your manhood or on your relationship level with your wife. Enjoy discovering your potential mistakes! By the way there is coming the "other side" of the coin soon, that is the 5 mistakes women must avoid! My wife is writing it! 1. Thinking you can teach your wife how to ski. You have no idea what you are getting into! Do not even think of teaching your wife how to ski! There are two activities that all sane , mature men know never to do with wives! They are; teaching them to drive and ski! I do not care if you are level 3 ski instructor with 25 years of experience! I do not care if you have skied since you were 2!This is not an issue about your skiing skills! This is an issue about how strong your marriage is, if ( and it is a big IF) she will accept you as teacher, and if you are good teacher! Trust me if you decide to undertake this dangerous "mission" you have a great deal to lose. That money you are "saving" on ski instruction will cost you a lot, as you will discover at the end of the ski day! Ski instructors are professionals who know how to teach. They do not have to go back with wife to room at end of day! You do! The ski instructor does not have "other unresolved" issues with wife.Well most don't! You do! The ski instructor is not emotionally involved with your wife's progress! Well most aren't! You are! I hope I have convinced you NOT to teach your wife! If you do PM me for some marital counsellors in your area! 2. Selecting ski resorts or holiday based on your skiing level or needs Do not surprise your wife on a ski holiday in Valdez, Alaska because there is the greatest extreme skiing there!There is that new ski resort in China which offers free Yak rides to hotel! A ski holiday should be acceptable to both partners! Both partners should respect each others needs,,,in all respects! I go on ski holiday with my wife,,but I rarely ski with her! She thinks I ski too fast , I think she skis not slowly but,,, well she likes to look like Stein! With elegance all the way! Always with perfect beautiful turns from top to bottom! Regardless of run! I like to challenge myself, be on the edge! Not so much with speed but with the run! Find that tighter turn, that steeper dip! She,,, elegant always!!!! Pick a center and hotel that meets both your needs! 3. Pick her skis! No man would dare pick and buy a women's bra,yet men constantly pick and buy a ski for their wifes! You are playing with fire!A ski for a women is an "extension" of her skiing being! She must be "comfortable" with her skis! No matter if they are the very best pick of all the world ski experts, if she does not like them, you are in hot water! Every time an edge catches, every time a turn is missed, every time she hits a tree, it will be your fault! Men and women are different! Can we agree on that! Men and women buy products for different reasons! Do not even question that! That is why women will spend $500 on hand bag or $300 on shoes! Do not even question why! These are mysteries of the mind even Freud did not solve! Just accept it!!!!It will make your marriage longer and more "stable and happy! Now back to the skis! What ever you do, do not give her your old ski! That is cause for divorce! May I suggest you find a person who knows skis well and invite her/him for supper! During this supper your wife can express what she wants in skiing, what she desires while she skis! Then let them go to ski shop! Of course you pay! 4. Talk constantly about your "boys ski trip" There is a wise saying that all rugby players know! It is, "what goes on a rugby tour, stays on a rugby tour" Enjoy your ski holiday by all means, but once over,,,,,tuck the pictures in your "vault"! Make all fellow skiers to swear never to mention that; jump you took off the cliff, the bar pick up, that strange man you invited for powder skiing, that extra wine you had on the chair etc...Trip over, go on with your life! She just might organize a "girls" ski trip and as the song says,,,,never never return! Lost in that ski heaven! 5. Rent a ski house with 20 other skiers! This last one really really is sinful! Without telling your wife and to save money you rent a house with 20 university students! Hey no problem,, while they are in class,,you have the house to yourself! Problem with students is that the 20 students have 50 "friends" who happen to show up! Find you room cosier, your food better and wife,,,well more mature! Its another life and another galaxy that they live in! Do not even consider it! Stay with the old folks , over 25! Very strange things happen in ski houses that I can not discuss on this site since I am sure Dave , the site administrator will bar me from this site! If you are above 50, mature and want to know PM me ! Hope you have enjoyed these personal errors I have done!Hope you learn from my mistakes! It is your choice! |
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Jan,
You do like to "stir the pot"! Can we agree that there are some "habits" and behaviors that are "generally" not accepted by most "socialized" humans! We no longer have "spitting pots" in rooms or bars! We do not tolerate persons who do not bath for two or three months (as they did in the French courts) We do not tolerate loud, aggressive behavior! We do not tolerate eating with our hands at the table.(well with some foods you do) All behaviors that once we "acceptable" To me smoking is a habit which has been made "acceptable" by tobacco companies with very effective long term marketing programs started in the 1900s!Just think of the "sophisticated" movie stars with their long long cigarette holders a la Greta Garbo, or the many many film scenes associating sex and smoking! Once addicted it is so hard to stop. I admire ex-smokers! I have no problems sharing my strong anti-smoking views! That does not mean I do not like the person,,it is the habit I hate. I loved my mother-in-law,,,I hated what cigarettes companies did to her! She died because of smoking and I took care of her until she died in my home! So yes I have no sympathy for smoking, like I have no sympathy for cocaine addicts, etc... Let us be honest Jan,,,even if you had two rooms just for smokers,,the smell will filter or spread to other rooms! It will "generalize" to your inn! Sorry I am very firm about this issue! In my office, no one smokes! In my meetings no one smokes! In my classes no one smokes!In my house no one has ever smoked! We are afraid to say what we all know,, smoking kills! Now back to skiing! |
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Mike,
Italy, is there snow there? Seems there is more snow here in Austria! Tell you what Mike, when that 5 million will be won, I will pay for you and Judy to stay at this place. It is now formally on cyber space! But first you will have to do Sunday River on Rogue Angel for a week as a tune up to the great runs here! |
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Mike,
Do you think we could hold our annual meeting at this place! Seems pleasant and can accept our non-smoking ways! Do you think they have a "private" landing area for your Lear Jet? If you look at site pictures you will see very warm and clean rooms! How many people have you got registered for our meeting? Perhaps the Atlantic Seniors Ski Club could visit Austria next year! Do they take "older senior skiers"? |
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Colemangavin,
Parents could learn a lot by watching your video1 1. Use of ski bra 2. Parent below and ahead of child encouraging 3. Another adult above 4. Of course taping session so in 20 years it will be a treasure video! Call me up in 20 years, to share benefits of your great parenting! |
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We all want our children to love this great sport! It is perhaps the only sport you can practice with your children until you are 90 years old,,,yet we often make fatal initial errors as skiing parents!
In our enthusiasm to introduce this "life style" we often forget basic parental rules! Here are some very common mistakes many many parents do! These "errors" are more relevant when you have very young children in the 2-4 year old age range! They do also apply in many cases for older children ( in the 13-19 age range)! 1. Creating stressful situation Children are very sensitive to parental emotional state. They "read" very well how you feel! What they will remember most in later years is not the great snow, the beautiful views, the fresh air,,,,but your attitude while introducing this activity! If you wait till you are on holiday to introduce skiing while you are stressed because airline problems, hotel , problems, ski equipment problems, then it will not be positive!They will sense your stress. Try wearing new ski boots around house before holidays. Try walking around outside with skis in park! I built a small ski run in my back yard for my kids. They had hours of fun going up and down this small 4 meter slope! They learned to walk on skis, climb up slope (in various ways)! All this before holiday! 2. Letting "stranger" teach them! Most children are not at ease with "strangers" at 2 years old.Leaving them with "stranger" may not be the best teaching solution! May I suggest that some of the basic skiing activities are very much like games!You do not have to be great skier to "introduce" some basic skills! Here are some; -putting on skis ( can be done inside house) -Walking around with skis ( yes can be done on carpets) -releasing skis -sliding down small hill (small to you is HUGE to them) -wearing ski clothing ( more complex than you think) 3.Taking child on lifts Using lifts is a stressful situation! Many adults have problems with lifts! Imagine a child! I never take any child on a lift until they are comfortable with skis.Many ski resorts now have a chair suspended near lodge so that beginners can just sit on it to get feel! Using a T bar or J bar is actually more difficult! Avoid them at all cost! Many smart resorts have the famous "magic carpet" lift! It is a 2 meter wide rubber "carpet" that once you are on it takes you up! I always waited till one of my children would say, "daddy why can't I go up that lift?" Then I would introduce them to lift by watching others get on! I would tell attendant to stop or slow lift on first lift off! I would also bring small chocolate bar with me and give it to them while on lift!They would concentrate on this great bar rather than "other" views! 4. Trying to teach "techniques" Children are learning all sorts of activities! How to run, jump, catch a ball, etc...Skiing is just another game. Another challenge! Let them discover their own techniques! Often then are correct! Let them have fun! Do you teach the correct way to slide down on a sled or roll down a hill? Just wait till they ask you for help! (this is also true for your wife/husband)! Children at this age learn by "modeling" by watching and imitating how you ski! That is why boys walk like their fathers! You ski well!! They will ski well! 5.Wanting your child to "conform" to your conditions! This is perhaps the greatest error parents make, not just in skiing but in all sorts of family activities! You are on holiday! It is YOUR holiday so child must adjust to your needs, your desires!He/she must fit in! Sorry you are heading towards problems! A child is not an adult! A child will not ski all day without attention!All the children want at this early stage is parental approval! They ski because they want you to be proud! They look for your kiss, hug and tap on head! Not for the great powder, great view or great ski run! That will come later! If you decide to bring your children on ski holiday, then you must give them attention and adjust your schedule according to their needs also! I often see holidays ruined because parents bring children skiing but do not really want to ski with them!Off to the day care! Off to the ski school for 4 hours! ( So you can get that great skiing let us be honest)! That initial skiing pleasure will cost you lots later! You must think like a child and what his/her needs are on a ski holiday! If you think giving him/her some money so that they can play video games in lobby will "liberate" you for more skiing, you are wrong! The few hours you will spend with your girl and boy in the initial stages of learning skiing will be "given back to you" years later when you are too slow while skiing! It will be "pay back time" trust me it will happen! Hope this helps the younger parents! |
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After "sleeping on it" I feel all parents must understand that they must think like their children when sking at young age ( 2-4 years old)!
Most children will not do a complete day of skiing at 2-4 years old! Most children have a short attention span so more than 2 hours on skis becomes a "negative" experiance! Most children do not have all the muscular developement to do an all day ski session! Most children will remember the "feeling" the emotive experience of skiing when they "grow up"! That is what parents must consider! That is what will motivate a person to ski! If this is a first experience, start with short sessions of 30 minutes with just walking around on skis! Just that is quite a challeneg even for some adults! Then learn to climb up hill! To set edges while standing! Some adults have not mastered this,,juts witness how many slide down sideways on slope! The learn how to fall down correctly! Yes there is a correct technique in falling down! Then teach basic rules in skiing! There is a man who is suing an 8 year old boy who hit him, because boy did not respect skiing rules ( according to man)!How do you do this? Explain basic rules, (that many adults do not know) such as; where to stop, how to avoid "others", etc... Notice we have not yet gone up hill and skied down! It is the reponsibility of every parent to "prepare" children to the ski experience! Please do not just rent skis and go up chair right away with child! If you do not know rules or ski techniques please get a knowledgeable person to help! I see so many parents "teaching" their child all sorts of wrong "attitudes" and ski techniques that will take a lifetime to erase!You allow another adult to teach your child how to read, do math,,then why not allow another "teacher" also introduce the great sport to your child! You will have a better holiday and your child will have such a positive feeling about this sport that when you will be 90 he/she will take the time to help you get into your ski boots! Hope this helps you ! |
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