The Never List

Back to the Never List !

Since posting some of my skier friends have asked me to "share " with you the

NEVER NEVER EVER LIST

1. never bring skis into hotel room
2. never warm up nylon gloves or jacket on electric base heaters
3 never ever put on "Cocaine" perfume or such when going into a tram
4 never every go to toilet stall with a one piece suit ( if you do not know why ask ,,,)
hint,,wet floors
5. never ever ask for those orange tipped looking skis
6. never place unprotected skis on car roof
7. never ever wear ski boots inside Inn, hotel or such
8. Never ever wear long thong" underwear" while skiing
9. Never ever wear jeans while skiing
10.Worst is to wear very very tight jeans while skiing ( except if you are with Tony )
11. never ever clean goggles with gloves, rough material
12. never park your car in a "handicapped zone" in ski parking
13. never ever leave skis flat in a parking lot beside car
14. never ever talk about how great skiing was while boss is around
15.never ever lend your skis to a beginner
16. never ever have supper with your ski outfit ( take a shower, change int,,,,)
17. never ever ( unless told to,,) pass your ski instructor during lessons
18 never ever hit your ski instructor
19. never every tell your instructor how he/she SHOULD teach this technique
20 never but never lay your board across my skis while on chair
21 never,,,,but never come over my ski tails while in line
22 never but never take out cell phone, Ipad, computer, etc,,,while skiing down slope
23. never ever leave ( at 9 am) all your skiing material on tables to "save table" for dinner
24. never ever lean skis, boards against glass windows at chalet, resto etc,,,
25. never ever ski with your child on your back ( World Cup racers still catch edges)

Really we have seen skiers do all of the above ! Strange creatures skiers !
Common sense and manners seem to be left at home !!!!

How about never wear you're skiing jacket out in the evening.

Ian,
That is a "tough one" ! A borderline case.

When I go off to ski for two weeks, I bring along skiing material. The essentials ! Since I do go to skiing towns, skiing resorts I rarely bring my "dinner jacket" or power suit !

I do bring a ski coaches jacket which looks more "formal" !

What is really ba manners, is to wear ski jacket DURING supper or worst those low low cut boarder pants while having supper!

Ian was is the ultimate worst is to "slip into your pocket,,bread, muffins,,,etc,,,," in your jacket for later meals !

Seen it !

pavelski wrote:Ian,
That is a "tough one" ! A borderline case.

When I go off to ski for two weeks, I bring along skiing material. The essentials ! Since I do go to skiing towns, skiing resorts I rarely bring my "dinner jacket" or power suit !

I do bring a ski coaches jacket which looks more "formal" !

What is really ba manners, is to wear ski jacket DURING supper or worst those low low cut boarder pants while having supper!

Ian was is the ultimate worst is to "slip into your pocket,,bread, muffins,,,etc,,,," in your jacket for later meals !

Seen it !

Must say I have never done it, but I'm sure it must go on :lol:

ok so i`ll fess up and admit that i have broken many of the golden rules too, Including skiing in my wedding dress. :twisted:

AJ! You are back! I was thinking of you and A just last week.

Never ~ absent yourself from J2ski for so long!

AJ,
There are "special occasions" when that never list does not hold!

I must also confess that I once skied with my tuxedo ( with shorts). That is another story !

I am sure you did it with style !

The question begs to be asked,,,,,"were you on the ski slope when you got married" ? If so yes,,then you are "classic" !

Welcome back !

Pavel

One question to you SwingBeep in regards to that list.
Do you know the difference between criterion referenced evaluation of skis and normative referenced evaluation of skis?

Yes, these are two-part tests. In the first part the skis are compared with each other to assess which performs best on snow; this is a norm-referenced test. In the second part the skis were subjected to physical tests. In one of these tests 17 Joules were applied to the inside edges of the skis in order to simulate catching an edge on a rock; this is a criterion- referenced test. Three of the skis purchased from one manufacture failed this test, one also failed the impact test (part of the base delaminated) and they all had thinner edges and therefore thinner bases than the other skis.

There is a key to the scoring system below the tables which translates as follows:

++ = very good (80-100%)
+ = good (60-79.99%)
O = average 40- 69.99%)
(-) = below average (20-35.99%)
- = unsatisfactory 0-19.99%)

In 2011 all the "low quality", inferior skis are gone!

Hope you're right, but I'm far from convinced.

Getting back to the never list. How about Never, Never Ever throw up in the cable car!