The 10 "unforgiving" sins beginner skiers make.

I didn't bother learning to carry skis,i just get my butler to carry them for me....!

paulschlote wrote:I didn't bother learning to carry skis,i just get my butler to carry them for me....!

Very sensible and, of course, the socially responsible thing to do. Providing employment!
Mind you be careful in France unless your Butler has the correct qualifications. Potentially dangerous if an unqualified Butler carries Skis........

I think his suitably qualified, he always has a glass of Pimms at the ready once i've completed a run....!

Smashing chap that Jeeves old boy -)

I'm not sure if the poster is suggesting leaving skis outside, but I would never leave my skis outside overnight; a) because they would freeze and b) because your insurance! wouldn't cover you if they were nicked!

I think one of the great things about skiing is that you can have fun as mixed groups.

Assist someone to carry skis to bus; which is only really good manners. After that who cares what they get upto as long as they are having fun. People who try to babysit family members or better 1/2's are frankly crazy, that is what ski school is for (only way to learn).

Avoid that rookie mistake and you won't have to worry about the other 9 points.

Don't let your mates teach you how to ski.

Don't believe your mates when they say that you'll be able to snow plough the black run.

Don't believe your mates when they say that they've never fallen off a button lift. Mind you, it's not a seat.

Don't believe anything your mates tell you. They are invariably worse skiers than they say they are.

If you miss a chair lift, don't try to run after it to "nip in" - saw this last year - lady got a nasty whack from the chair

And don't sit down before the chair is there.....saw that too. Quite funny. But painful.

Don't try to do a snow plough stop when you get off the chair lift just because there's a little slope to go down. You may find that the chair gives you a not-so-gentle push.

Don't try to hug, squeeze, squash or otherwise take me out when you get off the chair.

Don't moan about the cold. It's winter. On a mountain.

No, you are not "carving" when you ski. Looking at the size of you, you are more likely to be "calving".

If you stand-up your skis, do not stand them up in a nice cross shape. Whilst aesthetically pleasing, the nice man/woman from the piste patrol won't be happy when he/she finds you in fine form, having a sarny and can of pop.

Do not play hide and seek in those nice bumps and dips. They are called rollers.

It is not cool to go hooning down a mountain out of control when you are supposed to be following the rep/guide, especially when you are the size of a baby elephant. Except a baby elephant would be better at skiing.

/rant

Brumski wrote:I'm not sure if the poster is suggesting leaving skis outside, but I would never leave my skis outside overnight; a) because they would freeze and b) because your insurance! wouldn't cover you if they were nicked!

I'm interested to know how skis 'freeze' overnight and don't freeze when left outside a mountain restaurant in sub-zero temperatures or when in contact with the snow all day or on a bitterly cold chairlift at altitude! :D

paulschlote wrote:I didn't bother learning to carry skis,i just get my butler to carry them for me....!

Paul, I confess that I find your actions to be reprehensible.I have previously posted on J2ski, that I allow my butler to wax my skis. Of course he is a level 4 waxer, one would not expect any less.

And then I do allow my butler to hoist the skis on my shoulder, but I insist, at great personal sacrifice, on carrying my own skis.

One benefit is that it allows the butler time to get on with his normal menial duties, such as dusting my spare ski poles,

We have a duty to look after our people.

Sniff.